So began the pitch I gave my wife to let me join the marrieds-looking-for-affairs website Ashley Madison.
It would be part of my research into women who cheat, why infidelity is increasing, and what can be done to possibly affair-proof a marriage.
I responded to a few messages, and before I knew it I was invited to a chat session with "Sexy Cat" (profile name changed to ensure her anonymity).
With my wife watching TV on the couch a mere 10 feet away, here I was talking dirty to a 36-year-old married woman (who's husband was probably watching TV on the couch a mere 10 feet away from her). I discovered that to satisfy their deep longing for passion with minimal risk, many women sign up for Ashley Madison to have virtual sex via chat. Most of these women seemed comfortable in getting what they needed online.Over the next several days, I had chat sessions of varying length with 33 different women (hmm ... It was arm's-length cheating for them (and perhaps one-handed typing). We got into a long discussion about the arm's length approach to cheating these women had, and if it was really cheating.I needed to uncover the motivations behind starting and maintaining an affair. Numerous websites are dedicated to connecting those looking to engage in flagrante delicto sans spouse.Married Cafe and Lonely Wives Affairs are but the tip of the iceberg, and all have women and men signing up in droves.I signed up for a second Ashley Madison account as a woman, "Shelly," and began checking out the guys' profiles. I hadn't even added a picture or completed the profile for that persona.
Most of the men's profiles highlighted attempts at humor, asking straight-out for sex, to ... With a firm understanding of where my competition played—and the miserable approaches of some—I got to work writing something unique, confident, and (hopefully) mysterious and seductive.My hypothesis was simple: women who were looking for an extramarital affair with another married man were looking to connect in some way.If both parties were married, they not only started on even ground, but they had something in common—they were missing something from their current relationship.After a long pause, I got her only thought: "No, I get it," she said emphatically. But it's kinda like asking the newly vegetarian fox to guard the henhouse, isn't it? I worked hard to become the embodiment of seduction." I thought about it, and unfortunately her statement wasn't too far from the truth. To quickly read the spoken and unspoken clues of what a woman was looking for in a man, and then give her the perception I was that guy.I proposed to "cheat" on her for a few weeks, to talk to and attempt to seduce as many women as possible, and get a real-world understanding of why women want to stay married but also need some illicit action on the side.